unmade

yester day is all mysteried up
you were on my doorstep, begrudged
newly flavorful, head all full of smiles
who ever told you that i have some charm
worthy of the crosstown shuttle, fare
paid with your old pawned watches
who ever told you that?

i gave your sofa to a silly fool
moving awkward round the seventh floor
no grace, just heavy steps that seem
to have a peculiar rhythm, i fell entranced
no explanations necessary, or stories needed
it gave such little sleep, comfort badly
areek with you and citrus splashes

i relish my closet, nearly empty, heady
with disorder, misarranged, and i never realized
how bare has gone the day, unalphabetized
am i grown near to the man you followed
shaking in the cold, balancing my laundry
such a feat of derring do, you found impressive
but who ever told you that i have charm?

and i never was the man you loved,
where did you find him here?
with my locks and inhibitions,
bow ties from uncle jack,
mirrors turned in due discretion,
but i never failed your passion,
never used your trust,

and i wonder if a backward turn
will keep the bed unmade
i hide my socks in paper boxes,
snug beneath the bed, have never
found the value of an iron,
2 towels in the bathroom
were never quite enough

did you ever understand that
i'm not a dream, that i'm
wholly and awfully substantial,
so please tell me, truthfully,
where did you find him here?